Category Archives: President
Due Process Parody
We’re told the House Intelligence Committee impeachment hearing isn’t a legal proceeding. But it’s a political one and the rules of due process don’t seem to apply.
Due Process
With that in mind, here are a few of Chairman Schiff’s rules for the hearing:
No Trump lawyers or White House counsel are permitted.
Trump may not confront his accuser (the whistleblower). And the whistle blower won’t testify. That’s because Schiff says his testimony would be redundant and unnecessary .
Unlike Trump, apparently Hunter Biden is above the law and any investigation of him would be considered a sham. So Hunter won’t be testifying either.
And, finally, outing the whistleblower is strictly forbidden and will be be considered an ethics violation.
Impeachment Express Secret Testimony
Past impeachment inquiries were handled by the House Judiciary Committee. But Nancy Pelosi snatched that job from Jerry Nadler and gave it to Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff. Now he’s taking whistle blower testimony in secret and the Impeachment Express is on track to take down Trump.
Pelosi runs the railroad but she’s a reluctant impeacher. She says nobody comes to Congress to impeach a president,
Well, almost nobody. And now Nancy’s on board to impeach The Motherf***r
Adam Schiff Parody Parade
House Intelligence Chairman Adam Schiff riffed to Congress about President Trump’s phone chat with Ukrainian President Zelensky. You can catch his act here on YouTube. He doesn’t get rolling until the 4:15 mark. Schiff explained it was a parody. Here’s what Trump actually had to say.
John Dean No Rosemary Woods
House Judiciary Committee Chairman Jerry Nadler thought it would be a good idea to have John Dean testify about Watergate. And John Dean was happy to oblige. After all, he may be a convicted felon but he’s no chicken – or Rosemary Woods.
But he did say that Russiagate was just like Watergate, only worse.
However, unfortunately for Chairman Nadler, the media spent most of the day covering a helicopter crash in New York City.
House Judiciary Committee One, Barr None
The House Judiciary Committee voted to hold Attorney General Barr in contempt of Congress. Chairman Jerry Nadler demands that Barr turn over a complete unreacted copy of the Mueller report on collusion with Russia. But Nadler knows Barr can’t do that because the report contains grand jury testimony. And that’s illegal. Barr has made a minimally redacted version available to certain members of Congress. But so far no Democrats have bothered to take a look.
