Category Archives: Baseball
Dr. Fauci’s First Pitch, and His Second Pitch
Dr. Fauci pitched like an Imperial College Covid-19 model. Not very accurately.
As you can see, I drew this before Dr. Fauci actually threw his MLB season opening first pitch last night. His high school basketball skills didn’t translate to baseball. But then neither did President Obama’s, or Michael Jordan’s for that matter.
In fairness, it must be nerve racking standing in the middle of a major league stadium with all those cardboard cutouts staring you down.
Here’s the 60 foot gold standard of first pitches at game 3 of the 2001 World Series in Yankee Stadium. It turned out to be the last time the country was united.
Snitch on Neighbors is New Viral Ethic
Mayor de Blasio encouraged citizens to snitch on their neighbors:
“We still know there’s some people who need to get the message. And that means sometimes making sure the enforcement is there to educate people and make clear we’ve got to have social distancing,”
So, New Yorkers responded by overloading His Honor’s snitch line with middle fingers.
NBA Finals All About The Refs
So far the NBA finals have been all about the refs. In game one they overturned a charging call against Kevin Durant and changed it to a blocking foul against LeBron James. Durant went on to sink both free throws and tie the game.
Collision Collusion
But charging calls are only reviewable if the chargee – LeBron in this case – is thought to have been in the restricted zone. He wasn’t, but once the investigation was open they went after him for a different violation. His feet weren’t sufficiently planted when he took the collision.
NBA Finals All About the Refs
The NBA issues a Two Minute report on the officials after it’s all over and not reviewable. They say the prosecutors..er..refs got the charging call right. But Draymond Green should have been called for a foul against LeBron with 12 seconds remaining. Not only that, Green committed a lane violation on George Hill’s missed free throw with 4 seconds left.
That’s an opportunity cost of three more free throws for the frustrated Cavs.
Commissioner Bans Wahoo
The Cleveland Indians 70 year old icon, Chief Wahoo, has gone the way of the image of The Prophet. Kind of. There was no rioting. There were no murders. Instead, baseball commissioner Rob Manfred offered Indians ownership a deal it couldn’t refuse. And Wahoo was sent to the showers.
In exchange, the Dolan family gets to keep discreet licensing rights to the chief on promotional paraphernalia. And Cleveland gets to keep the 2018 All Star game. Probably.
Wahoo Gear
Tribe gear worn by the players, however, will no longer bear the graven image of the famed indigenous cartoon person. Instead players will sport the block “C” on their sleeves and hats when they take the field.
I think it stands for politically “Correct.”
Red Sox Apple Watchgate Scandal
Hockey players use high tech composite sticks. But major league baseball players use wood bats. And, in an age of encrypted digital communication, they stick to hand signals.
Apple Watchgate
At least that’s what we thought until the great Boston Red Sox Apple Watchgate scandal. The Sox got busted for stealing signs and relaying them via Apple Watches.
